back track, think back

when I wake up in the morning and my alarm clock starts to going
I don't think that imma make it on time
By the time I grab books and I give myself a look
I'm at the corner just in time to see the bus fly by.

High school. Four yrs ago I was a senior at lansdowne high.
Nothing special was happening. I was in pain because of X. Heartbroken. But I hid it well
I could always hide it well
Maybe that's my super power, to hide those vulnerable emotions
To gather the scattered pieces of my life and move on
Making it look easy for on lookers.
Or maybe it's a curse...o well
But yeah..he bitched me, got me good
And I hated him for it
But that didn't ruin my sense of humor because apparently I did get the last laugh
My life went on..things were so simple then

I believe I would have been going to an award luncheon today
To celebrate my accomplishments throughout the yr and yrs
My mother wouldn't come to it ...no matter
She would go to the bigger more important banquet for the better award
But my boss came
And she acted like a proud mother
This should have been a happy easy day despite running around making sure things were ready and dreading reading an introduction in public
But I was still raw and bleeding from X's mayhem.

Fast forward four yrs
I still have the scar but it's faded
I still work the job but only until college is over
I still have my sense of humor
But I still hurt
Different reasons now and not as much as before
But I still hide it well
To my own detrement.